Perfect Practice

I think it was my 8th grade math teacher that taught me, "Practice doesn't make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect." I understood the principle and could see it's helpful application in the pages of homework for the class. However, it became life changing when I decided to use the principle in overcoming my angry responses, which were so habitual they were second nature to me.

Practically every frustration, request, or interruption became a cause for a caustic or terse response from me. Over and over again, I would tell myself to be kind, gentle, and patient. Then, when an occasion arose to act on my new commitment, before I had time to even think about my goals, something sarcastic would escape my lips.

I studied and memorized scriptures, saying such things as, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers," and "For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile."

The problem was I never had a chance to practice perfectly what I believed. I just kept practicing poorly over and over again. Finally, I recalled something I had done with my kids years before. When they needed to correct their responses to one another, I had them say it over again, right then, but using a better choice of words, tone of voice, or both. So that's what I did. I'd say, "Wait, let me try that over again." At first the kids thought I was wanting them to change something, but I made it clear this was for me, and they were patient and obliging, and after a while, even grateful.

Sometimes it was just a matter of engaging my brain before my mouth. Sometimes it was a function of getting control of my volume. Other times I really had to think a little to be able to verbalize my concerns in an appropriate and truthful way. But it worked! My bad habits were slowly being replaced by better habits. It was a case of perfect practice making perfect. So when you catch yourself a few seconds too late, you can still change it, but don't wait until next time. Just say, right then and there, "Wait, let me try that again." Then give it some perfect practice.